Drama, drama, drama

By all means use sometimes to be alone.  Salute thyself; see what thy soul doth wear.

~George Herbert

This week was a tough week.  The semester is coming to an end, and whenever that happens there is tons to do – research papers, reading reports and final exams.  On top of that, I’ve been launching my first workshop for my business, so I’ve been out and about more than usual.  I’ve also been on the phone and on my laptop more than usual when I am at home.  I knew I was busy and feeling a little stressed.

About midweek my little man had a meltdown because I didn’t do something I told him I would do.  I tried to explain that it was an honest oversight and I simply had run out of time.  With tears streaming down his face, he grumbled that I’ve been saying that a lot lately.  After a few more dramatic exchanges, we made peace and he went to bed.

The next day my moxie girl had a rough day and seemed extremely agitated.  We struggled through the day together – because I simply had too much to do!  The next evening while driving home from childcare, she told me I haven’t been listening to them and I’m always on my laptop doing my work.

My heart sunk.  🙁

“I guess I have, huh?”

“Yep.”  She says and looks out the window.

The next day I had planned to spend the day working on one of my papers all day since I didn’t have to work my part time job or have any classes.  But, instead … I gave myself some much needed self-care.  I knew I needed to find my center – so I could give to my children and focus on them.  I journaled, I took a warm bubble bath, I spent quiet time alone and meditated and prayed.  I had to check in, regroup and re-prioritize.

Being an available parent is one of my main definitions of personal success.  Whenever my kids start to feel like I am not “available” to them in any way – it’s time to put on the brakes and re-examine my life.  Period.

My research paper will be late.  I’m okay with that.  My marketing strategies will not be addressed this weekend.  I’m okay with that.

But, after I picked the kids up that afternoon – I had quality snuggle time with my moxie girl and we played cards (one of our favorite past times together!).  My little man and I had some great conversations (he’s quite the budding philosopher!).  We piled in my bed that night and I read stories from “The Book of Virtues” and we discussed the moral lessons in each.  And, then we all drifted off to sleep, feeling connected and centered.

(sigh) … better. 😉